Why Failure is Sometimes Okay

Last year I set out to be awesome by accomplishing 30 things before I turned 30. For some reason, likely a lack of psychotherapy and a need to set arbitrary quantifiers of success, I set these goals for myself. But I essentially set myself up for disappointment by coming up with a list of 30 things I thought I should do in a year, on a limited budget with respect to both time and money.

I turned 30 on Sunday and accomplished just over 60% of my goals. That’s a “D” if you’re grading me. But it doesn’t mean I failed.

Photo credit for my motivational poster: Trek Earth

It just means that my definition of success was too arbitrary.  While I may not have completed the 30 things I set forth to do a year ago, that doesn’t make me a failure. It makes me someone who was too busy living life to be completing things on a list I wrote a year ago that don’t matter to me now.

The next time you don’t succeed at something, ask yourself if it matters. It is something that will make you happy, more fulfilled, or better at life? Failing at anything less than that, isn’t failing at all.

Love in the time of instagram

A recent text message conversation had me thinking about dating in a time of social media. Particularly how strange and telling, yet remarkably organic, it is.  If you’re like me and you’re a self-proclaimed social media guru, chances that you’re going to date someone and NOT stalk the ever loving crap out of them on social media is slim to none.  Facebook pictures of college exes that make your stomach turn are nothing.  I’m talking about how after a couple of cocktails you both realize you’re on Twitter and Instagram and make the bold and possibly regrettable move of following each other and delving into the mind of someone who you barely know.  And any fantasy you ever had of this other person is gone forever.

What sounded like fun while you’re trying to network or make new friends or get more followers will morph into a wrath of agonizing insecurity and self doubt.  Do I post too many selfies?  Why was he liking all of my selfies late at night?  That’s kind of creepy.  I bet he’s wondering what my butt looks like naked with all of the burger pics I post.  Man I post a lot of burger pics.  Mmm, burgers… Why can’t I keep my food offline?  Control yourself woman! Speaking of which, he hasn’t answered my texts all night.  Is he on a date? He just ‘grammed chocolate cake for TWO at the hottest new restaurant in town. Who’s that girl who liked his pic in 30 seconds?  Oh crap, that’s me–UNLIKE, UNLIKE!

You’re no longer mysteriously sexy (attributable to the burgers pics you post) and any veil of anonymity is completely gone.  He’s knows you’re not out tearing up the town.  You blew your cover showing off your yoga pants and free wine that you got in the mail.

But that’s ok, because chances are he’s just as bad as you.  You’ll find that poem posted 63 weeks ago that would be better off as lyrics to a Goo Goo Dolls song written on a bathroom stall at a rest stop in Ohio in 1998.  The cleverly crafted tweet posted 6 days too late.  The Zorro Halloween costume taken a LITTLE too seriously.  Or the cat memes.  So many cat memes. OMG, did you really go out with a man who posts cat memes?!

It’s a strange world we live in and even stranger to date in.  That’s love in the time of Instagram.

what to wear to a country concert

It’s officially summer which means that it’s country concert time and time for the perfect county concert outfit. When you’re out there shaking it for Luke Bryan you’re going to want to look good, right? So here’s a guide to what to wear to a country concert so you can be the tanned-legged Juliet to some Redneck Romeo.

First, cutoffs. For those of you who are anti-cutoffs, I apologize in advance, however I love them and practically live in cutoffs during the summer. They’re the quintessential country concert wear.

Here are some good pairs to get you started.  Personally, I love American Eagle’s shorts because they’re soft and stretchy and go on sale pretty often!

Target // American Eagle
American Eagle // Target
Tops for a country music concert run the gambit from edgy to patriotic to redneck.  As long as it looks good with cowboy boots, go for it!
1 // 2 // 3
4 // 5 // 6
7 // 8 // 9

It’s no surprise that I’m a huge fan of chambray and a country concert is a great excuse to get your chambray on!

Another option is a lace dresses that can be paired with boots and a denim jacket for a more feminine style.
Are you going to any country concerts this summer?  What are you wearing?

what to wear to a beer fest

This weekend I’m going to the Atlantic City Beer and Music Fest.  I got tickets for it knowing that any beer fest = good but I didn’t realize that it was such a huge event.  When mentioning it to people, I’ve gotten many variations of, “Wow, that will be amazing, I’ve always wanted to go!”.  Needless to say, I’m pretty excited.
I have been to one Beer Fest before and in the eyes of my mother, that makes me an expert so I’m writing to tell you what to wear to a Beer Fest.  Note: this dress code applies similarly to other alcohol involved parties and wild events like amusement parks or concerts where you will be standing for long periods of time with the likelihood that sticky drinks will be spilled on you.
As I mentioned in my 5 Truths in this post, I love to dress up.  I view concerts and Beer Fests as another excuse to dress up so feel free to be your normal self at these events or you can take my advice and let the fest inspire your fashion choices.

Determine your Crowd

Beer Fests draw particular crowds, namely hipsters and redneck types.  Will your area produce people that look like American Apparel models with flannel shirts, tattoos, ironic facial hair and a hat and/or wide rimmed glasses?

Or will your venue be filled with people looking to be the next Larry the Cable Guy?



If your Beer Fest is going to be full of people who dress with irony, then you should do the same and deck yourself out to the nines like a hipster.  The beauty behind the hipster outfit is that you can always say you wore something ironically.  So go ahead and wear that little league shirt to poke fun at the wussies who don’t keep score in their kids games today or break out that “Vive la France!” hoodie and walk around mocking the French with a “huh huh huh?!” at the end of every sentence.  You’re a hipster, it’s allowed.
For anyone wanting real advice, put on your finest pair of skinny jeans (rips optional), converse sneakers or biker boots, graphic tees, flannel/plaid shirts, scarves, thick rimmed glasses or Wayfarers, over sized beanie hat and smug expression. I’ll be wearing some version of this.
Ok, I’m kidding but I will be wearing a combo of the some of the following.


Skinny Jeans (ripped or colored jeans optional)
Patterned shirt (striped or plaid)
Ironic glasses (red Wayfarers)
Biker boots or Converse
Fake mustache (ok, probably not)
Festival headband optional (better suited for summer fests)


Skinny jeans
Graphic tee or plaid shirt
Converse or oxfords or boots
Layered shirts
Mustache, if you can grow it.  Make it long and waxed.  Or a beard.


If your venue will be filled with those who’d rather tussle in the parking lot than debate the advantages of their free-trade roll your own cigarette tobacco from Nicaragua, then you can wear whatever you want. But here are some ideas.


Jeans or cutoff jean shorts
Low cut tshirt or tank top (helps with cutting long lines)
Sundress dress
Cowboy boots
Camouflage/deer attire optional, but encouraged



Jeans (Skoal/Copenhagen ring optional)
Tshirt or flannel
Work or cowboy boot
Greasy ball cap

What to Bring to a Craft Beer Fest

Regardless of the type of crowd your Beer Fest attracts, there are certain things you need to bring to stay happy.


ID: You need to be 21+ to enter any Beer Fest in the US.
Comfortable Shoes: You’ll be walking around a lot.  This isn’t a fashion show, keep the heels at home.
Cross-body Bag: When you’re double fisting samples of beer, the last thing you want to do is to struggle with an over sized purse.
Sunglasses: Hides eyes from the sun, looks cool, aids in your hangover recovery.
Pretzel Necklace: It’s a palate cleanser, accessory, and snack all in one.
A note about the pretzel necklace, use butchers twine or a ribbon and the tiny pretzels.  This is supposed to be a palate cleanser and those huge sourdough pretzels, while they may look cool, will make you too full to finish your beer. I made this yesterday for my hipster beer fest today.  Note the smug expression.  I’ll fit right in.
Follow this guide and you should be ready to go to any Beer Fest!